29 Secret Admirer

In Secret Admirer, we find ourselves once again at a threshold, a recurring and significant space within the 1–100 series where choices are made, gestures are left behind, and outcomes remain uncertain. A closed front door dominates the composition, formal and composed, yet emotionally charged. At its base rests a small bouquet of red roses, carefully placed, quietly speaking on behalf of someone who has already departed. The admirer is absent, but their intention lingers.

This painting extends a visual and narrative conversation begun earlier in the series, most notably in Decision and Special Guest. In Decision, an unopened letter and a waiting suitcase suggested a moment of commitment or escape from the tension between staying and leaving, between certainty and doubt. The suitcase symbolised readiness, the weight of possibility packed and waiting. In Special Guest, a beautifully wrapped gift stood in for a person yet to arrive, anticipation made tangible through object and colour. Secret Admirer belongs to this lineage, where objects quietly carry emotional weight in place of human presence.

Here, the roses perform that role. They are intimate, vulnerable, and unmistakably personal. Unlike the suitcase or the gift, the flowers feel exposed, left out in the open, subject to time, weather, and response. Their placement on the doorstep suggests arrival, yet the closed door and the absence of the giver imply departure. The moment has already passed; we are left with its aftermath.

The scene’s architecture reinforces this emotional tension. Symmetrical steps lead the viewer inward, drawing the eye towards the door as if inviting us to complete the action the admirer could not. Bands of warm light fall across each step, suggesting late afternoon or early evening, a time frequently used throughout the 1–100 series to heighten uncertainty and introspection. Inside, a soft glow spills through the small window, hinting at life continuing beyond our reach.

Colour remains central to the storytelling. The deep greens and ochres of the doorway provide a calm, almost protective backdrop against which the red roses stand out with quiet urgency. Their colour speaks of passion, risk, and sincerity, while their scale emphasises vulnerability. They are small, almost fragile, yet impossible to ignore.

As with Surprise, the painting resists a fixed narrative. Are these flowers a declaration, an apology, or a farewell? Is the admirer hoping for discovery, or relief in anonymity? The title suggests affection held at a distance, emotion expressed indirectly rather than confronted.

Ultimately, Secret Admirer is a painting about timing and courage. It captures the space between intention and response, between arrival and departure. Like Decision before it, the outcome is unresolved. The door remains closed, the roses wait, and the viewer is left standing at the threshold, invited to imagine what happens next.

Oil on fine portrait linen: 125 x 95 cm; 49.21 x 37.4 in (Sold)